Questions and answers about dealing with media
QUESTION: If, as a parent, you ensure that your child does not use social media and spends only little time in front of screens, but it watches other peers using their own devices, this might create a feeling such as: "I am not allowed to do what other people my age are allowed to do." How do you explain that to an 11- to 12-year-old?
ANSWER: Leading psychologists and psychotherapists, as well as pediatricians, now advise parents, that children and young people under the age of 16 should to stay away from social media and minimize screentime – based on research and praxis experience. A leading representative of these professionals is the bestselling author from the USA Jonathan Haidt.1
Technology must serve—it must not dominate or manipulate, and certainly not create dependency and addiction. Fortunately, some countries like Australia, as well as committed school leaders, have already implemented this.
QUESTION: But how do you explain to 11- or 12-year-old children who are already active on social media that they should stop now?
ANSWER: At this age, you can already speak plainly: „You've already noticed how much time it takes, what it does to you mentally when you receive hate messages or criticism, how it keeps you from other activities that are much more important for your age! At your age, your body is growing – it has to use all of its senses, it has to move – but above all, your brain only develops healthily if you think for yourself, observe for yourself, judge for yourself, and don't stare at a screen on which everything is delivered to you ready-made and you don't have to do anything but react! For humans are active and creative beings, we don't just react to what others want from us. So if you want to develop independency and autonomy, you have to develop it yourself! Behaving like everyone else – that's what makes a herd – is not how you become independent. As a member of a herd, you become – at best – a good consumer and a manipulable voter in politics. Unfortunately, psychologists and doctors have only now discovered how harmful early screen consumption is. Millions of children and young people have already been damaged for life. But as long as I'm in charge, I choose the best for you and your future. And I hope we can support each other in this. When you're on your own one time, you can do whatever you want. But as long as I am responsible, I will do what I think is best for you."
I encourage parents to network with other parents who also want the best for their children, and then to ensure that artistic activities are encouraged on weekends and during free time such as music, creative hobbies, theater, reading, conversations, games (no computer games!), but also excursions, working projects in nature and sports. A developing body needs the constant interplay of sensory perception, motor skills, feelings, thinking, and actions – only then a healthy overall constitution can develop.
QUESTION: Can anything be done if a child was already exposed to an unhealthy home environment at the age of 6 (a lot of noise, aggression, and scolding)?
ANSWER: Yes, there is much that can be done! The most important thing is that an adult (therapist, educator, neighbor, godmother, godfather, grandmother, grandfather) who cares about the child maintains a healthy, reliable human relationship with them and becomes creative with them. Being loved and allowed to be creative, developing one's own positive initiative in the analog world, is the best way to foster resilience and autonomy.
QUESTION: You mentioned that a child needs at least one adult – a good, selfless companion. But what if the child had a neglectful home in their early years and now shows separation anxiety with the stable parent who is the only one really available to them?
ANSWER: If you want to help here, it's crucial to look within the child's environment (school, neighborhood, friends – psychologists, therapists, etc.) to see who can take on such a task: for example, closely accompanying such a child for a year, adopting them spiritually, so to speak, while simultaneously building a positive relationship with the parents so that they gain trust and entrust the child to you for creative activities as often as possible. Nothing can be achieved without genuine human commitment. But every genuine commitment (even if it's just one weekend a month to do something enjoyable with the child) is invaluable for this young person's biography.
QUESTION: Given the challenges of society and the challenges that children bring to their classrooms: Where can we find dedicated Waldorf teachers? And how can we support them while they take care of the school and our children?
ANSWER: This is one of the most important questions of our time! For centuries, schools have been considered places of discipline and the acquisition of knowledge. Rudolf Steiner, on the other hand, was already firmly convinced in 1919, when he held his first teacher training course, that time at school is a time of development – physically, mentally, and spiritually. It's about education, not knowledge. Knowledge can be acquired for exams if you are well-educated. That's no problem at all. Rudolf Steiner demanded that every person has the right to learn and develop up to the age of 18 – without exams, but with a sensitive description of the skills actually acquired at the end of each school year.
Young people who were allowed to develop in such a way should well be able to take the final examination necessary for their future career at the end of their school years. This could be any Diploma needed, either as certificate leaving secondary school or even a qualification as needed for admission to university. I myself was fortunate enough to study at a Waldorf school and develop freely until the 12th grade. Afterward, I happily spent a year preparing for the Abitur (university entrance qualification). I made the necessary effort of my own accord. I owe my lifelong joy in learning, discovering, and working toward constructive developmental goals to this fact. In other words: It's about empowering people during their school years to become healthy, physically, mentally, and spiritually capable, self-reliant individuals with strong character and empathy.
But this isn't possible without:
creative play,
artistic activity,
interest in nature and its significance for humans as well as for the life of plants and animals,
and the ability to ask the big questions of our time about the meaning of life and human development.
School is about finding one's own perspective on life, not about conforming to the performance standards of business and politics and adapting to their demands through constant testing. As a result, one's own developmental needs and desires remain unused or at least underestimated.
Therefore, I advise parents and anyone interested in children and young people, whose development is important to them, to complete a part-time Waldorf education course and embark on an inner developmental path, as described, for example, by Rudolf Steiner in his book "How to Attain Knowledge of the Higher Worlds."2 Without the will to educate and humanize oneself, one lacks the energy to do the best for one's own children, on the one hand, and to help overcome the current crisis (ecology, wars, hunger, poverty, unhealthy agriculture, etc.) on the other. Self-education is the best prerequisite for becoming a good educator for others. Society and the earth need people who wake up, take responsibility, and, through their own insight and decision, work for a better future for humanity and the planet.3
Vgl. Fragen-Beantwortung im Rahmen einer online-Tagung in Indien zum Thema „Resilienz Förderung im digitalen Zeitalter“, am 27. April 2025
- Jonathan Haidt,The Anxious Generation
- Rudolf Steiner, How to attain knowledge of the higher worlds?, GA 10, Dornach 1993.
- Michaela Glöckler, Growing up healthy in a world of digital media
Michaela Glöckler, Education for the futur: How to nurture Health and human potential?